I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. -- Groucho Marx
I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial. -- Irvin S. Cobb
I am reading Henry James...and feel myself as one entombed in a block of smooth amber. -- Virginia Woolf
I can't believe that out of 100,000 sperm, you were the quickest. -- Steven Pearl
I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. -- Mark Twain
His features resembled a fossilized wash rag. -- Alan Brien
His golf bag does not contain a full set of irons. -- Robin Williams
His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere. -- Mark Twain
His ignorance is encyclopedic. -- Abba Eban
His mind is so open - so open that ideas simply pass through it. -- F. H. Bradley
His mind is so open that the wind whistles through it. -- Heywood Braun
His mind was like a soup dish, wide and shallow; it could hold a small amount of nearly anything, but the slightest jarring spilled the soup into somebody's lap. -- Irving Stone (about William Jennings Bryan)
His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork. -- Mae West
His smile is like the silver plate on a coffin. -- John Philpot Curran
His style has the desperate jauntiness of an orchestra fiddling away for dear life on a sinking ship. -- Edmund Wilson (about Evelyn Waugh)
His voice was the most obnoxious squeak I ever was tormented with. -- Charles Lamb
I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse. -- Woody Allen
I'll bet your father spent the first year of your life throwing rocks at the stork. -- Groucho Marx
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. -- Groucho Marx
I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial. -- Irvin S. Cobb
I am reading Henry James...and feel myself as one entombed in a block of smooth amber. -- Virginia Woolf
I can't believe that out of 100,000 sperm, you were the quickest. -- Steven Pearl
I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. -- Mark Twain
She looked like a huge ball of fur on two well-developed legs. -- Nancy Mitford
She looks like she combs her hair with an eggbeater. -- Louella Parsons
She looks like something that would eat its young. -- Dorothy Parker
She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation. -- Jean Webster
She never was really charming till she died. -- Terence
She not only expects the worst, but makes the worst of it when it happens. -- Michael Arlen
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