Get to know Jack Schnitt

Jack is the only son of Awe Schnitt and O. Schnitt, and he has an interesting family tree:

In 1955, Awe Schnitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schnitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schnitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

Jack Schnitt grew up and married Noe, and together Jack and Noe Schnitt produced six children:

• Holie Schnitt (who came to be known as "The Lucky Schnitt").
• Fulla Schnitt Shineola (who didn't really have the Schnitt Face)
• Giva Schnitt
• Bull Schnitt (who really looked like Schnitt, the father)
• Dip Schnitt and Deep Schnitt (twins)

Dip Schnitt was not very bright, and was known as "The stupid Schnitt," and she married Dumb Schnitt, a high school drop out who happened to share the same last name (no relation, however). Friends affectionately nicknamed them "The Schnitts." Their marriage produced no little Schnitts.